I actually deleted my number from your dadsphone as he never sees my messages. It was annoying to know that my number had least importance in his day.
I haven't been to doctor for a month now and when I told him he said who has stopped you in the rudest tone possible. I think I am beginning to reverse engineer how certain old people become rude and irritable coz they don't get any love and eventually stop giving love to others. I told your dad all I want is a cup of coffee with him but he hasn't given it to me even once. My mom says I should focus on positive but I can't.
Though let's see - yeah he did take care of you during shoots .. and gave you massage and helped in your bath today but during bath I felt he was out of place.. he says call maid call maid... why does he need maid to take care of his own daughter.. btw that's a pic of me breastfeeding you during the shoot !
Anyways something is testing my love for everyone involved. I feel like leaving this shitty humanity behind .. and then while sleeping u grabbed my finger just now and I know it is just a phase and I will just be happier once I get some parenting or some love from someone.. maybe all I need is a kiss or a hug in the morning to fuel my entire day. I will soon be getting those from u - I hope so.
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